You know, once you’ve done something for a long time, looking back over your career and your life can really get to you. You realize how brazenly you made mistakes back at the beginning, you realize how long you didn’t really know what the hell you were doing and you realize just how brave you were. It makes you realize something: getting through life is difficult but you, to some extent, have got through it. Which is amazing.
You go girl!
Weddings are strange occasions. They are seemingly the couples ‘special day’ but are often far more about everyone else. Traditionally weddings are all about the families of the two getting wed, it is a joining of families and it is a day for the families. Over my many years at weddings I have actually noticed that often the weddings are far more for the parents than for the couple. The parents pay for the weddings, which is strange. Especially now that people don’t tend to get married at 17. Most people who I’ve photographed getting married have healthy careers and full lives. They are not kids starting their lives. They are adults with their own stuff going on. Yet for this day they suddenly become children again, desperate to fulfill their parents ideas of what a wedding looks like.
I’d say this is not the road to go down. You’re just obscuring what might be unique about you and your relationship. If this day is ‘your’ special day, why the hell does it look like everyone else’s special day? I think that actually a lot of people get frustrated with their wedding days in hindsight, recognizing that the ‘dream’ they lived might not have been their dream after all. They suppress this slight bitterness and get round it by pontificating on the beauty and magical nature of their one special day to their children, who then get sold the same dream that eventually comes to disappoint. It is a vicious cycle. If their is one lesson I’d give to those planning a wedding it would be this: Go Your Own Way.
Yeah! Come on, no apologies, you have to go for it and be who you are on this day more than anything.
Yes! That’s what I like to see, that’s the kind of thing I want to encourage as a wedding photographer. It’s good, it’s great, it’s real and it is you!